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you're on your way |
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
i just need you so much, and lately it feels like peanut butter and jelly,
its right like mixing salt and pepper.
six months passed and we're closer then ever,
i'm not even gonna try and use an analogy for that
cause facts are facts.
and even though its right
i can't help but contemplate.
today i will be the outsider,
but i just need you so much,
you don't understand how scared i've been lately,
and even though you're always near me,
part of me feels alone.
I need you so much,
every inch of me depends on you
and we've gone so far together,
yet i feel like we're on different lanes.
i don't really know how to make it sound right,
but we're just two very different people
like pieces of puzzles trying to fit together,
trying hard to make it all right.
we were two from a thousand,
what are the possibility of us being perfect?
we don't even talk anymore,
our time together consists of sleep, movies and mutual silence.
sometimes its a little more, the fun and games.
and you know me so well,
aren't you proud what you've learnt off by heart,
what i chose to show you.
in the end, you don't really know me at all.
and maybe i don't really need you.
just maybe.
idk whats wrong with me, lately it feels like i've been more moody, and my smiles and giggles don't seem tolast as long. i'm so tired but my head refuses to rest. idk, i've just been thinking about alot of things lately. and sometimes they scare me so much, my thoughts. i don't know where i'm going with them and i'm scared i'll just be filled with regret. and it jurts so much somtimes, its so overwhleming i feel like ive ben engulfed, dornwed.
your reassurance means so much to me, but lately i just haven't been feeling it.
désolé
Monday, July 4, 2011
I'm sorry, sorry for me. I'm sorry for overthinking things, i'm sorry for worrying, i'm sorry for my lack of trust, i'm sorry for making things harder. I'm sorry for where things have come, it could have been so much better, in so many ways.But do you know, i'm just so scared. I can't comprehend my incapability to let things go so wrong, lately it feels like everythings a mess. And its not your fault, you never tried to let me down, you always tried to make things better, and its stupid of me to feel this way. I just don't know what to expect.
And i'm so afraid that i'm drving you away, a little more each day. Yet i do these little stupid things that hurts so much, you mean so much to me, but i jsut feel so overwhelmed right now...