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Tuesday, December 28, 2010
I think I saw you in my dreams you were
Stitching up the seams on every broken promise
That your body couldn't keep.
- horrible tunes, great lyrics. guess you can't have the best of both worlds can you :L
i guesss, becuase a few times these past few months, i keep having dreams and this person keeps popping up. and i guess its no scary mdream or anything, but i get so overwhelmed from the perplexion of trying to figure out the situation. its like a video game and the controls just don't seem to be conducting the way you want them too.
honestly, this new years i want to go out and get hyped, but idk i guess it doesn't really seem like me :( i guess i just want to get away from some stuff and really get to meet new people. becuase in my comfort zone, i dont want anything to change, but i want to go out be wild, still comeback safe.
and thens theres this person that i''m always so hyped up to see, like i'm happy to talk to them, joke around blahblah. and i wouldn't want anything more or less to happen, but its merely becuase i'm so used to them being there- that when thy're not its weird you know? but honestly, it feels wrong. and now i cant stopped thinking about it.
theres this friend that i haven't talked to in a looong while. and like, i tried to call, but hmm idk. i guess its new years and i wonder if like the last year, some miraculous message would come and make my night.
anyways thats most of my thoughts for tonight xx
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
you know, theres always those friends you dont really talk to, but you can always come back to whenever you need? i guess this blog is like that, it gives me a sense of reassurance. it lets me say something, but not necessarily that whole world has to hear it. i dont know... i guess, i have a few thigns on my mind.
like you know some friendships, last longer then you would expect. you never expected to expect anything more, but once it ended you realise that you depended on it so much and that deep inside you wished that soemthing more could happen. but its like theres no point trying to force it, especially if the awkward silences are msot obvious, and youre differences are so big you can spot them 2837182319 kilometers away. my point is, im sadder and thinking about it more than i thought i would have.
plus, im kinda tired to put to much effort in you know? i mean, if i offer my hand and the other person doesnt take it, whats the use of me trying in the first place?
i wish, the person who i wanted to talk to was talkinggg, zzzzzzz. funny how thigns work x