itsHER
the girl next door


nguggy.
16; sydney. a relatively good girl. feeling like she has a lot to say yet doesn't know how. So maybe these stories and scribbles of thoughts might turn out pointless to you. Maybe You'll dig some meaning out of them. Or maybe, you'll maybe one day even think and feel like she does. Maybe one day, you'll finally truly understand. Maybe you could even tell them for her. Just maybe. xx_.

lalapewpewBOP!
herLOVESā™„
the bummies

melanie.
julie.
lamah.
angiee.

herJOURNEY
past & present

June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
December 2010
January 2011
July 2011
August 2011
October 2011
December 2011
affiliates
you're on your way

facebook.
tumblr.
formspring.

inspirations.
big world outside.

his.
hers.
this.
that.
Dear you,

because sometimes i don't know how to get you anymore;
because it was always you. && somehow i hope it always will be.
PPJjunior

toyou.
Sunday, November 1, 2009
so all of sudden after we talk; you changed your nick to "leave me alone" at first i didnt really notice because i was caught up. but then i felt wierd and couldnt pinpoint it... i wasnt talking to yu.

right now i feeel so useless... i can't help anyone. i can't make the people i love happy.. i'm dragging them into my own shits.

i just wanna help; i just wanna make you guys happy...
why are such simple actions ever so hard?

not everything is what it seems to everyone else about me..
and maybe its the same about my perspective on the world.
when you asked why i didn't trust yu.
i do. but thers a knot i get when i'm asked to trust in someone. when someone makes a promise to me..
maybe its because my mum didn't believe me of shits that happened when i was little..
maybe its because my dad broke promise after promise when i alway sput my trust in him..

and now my guard is so high up. i won't let anyone get close enough to hurt me.. in reality it hurt tens times as much ...

honestly i just don't trust myself anymore. every morning i try to laugh and smile to my friends i'm overwhelmed at night....
i lie to others. i lie to myself...
i can't even trust in myself anymore... i'm constantly letting myself down... what can i do now?


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