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life lessons...
Friday, June 26, 2009
never learnt?
you're suppose to learn them, and from them become wiser and blahblahblah. One lesson, no matter how many people have constantly told me, and no matter how many times i have been hurt from it, i don't think ill ever, ever learn from it. that is, to never get too over-excited about anything, too never fall head over heels over anyone. my argument is, temporarily, is there anything else for me to smile about? anything for me to look forward to ? 'cause the future is unknown. Yes, i did it again... and i realise that i did it, but i don't think that id ever learn from it. now I'm contemplating, whether or not i should trust in you ? other life lessons? well to know when to close your mouth, to do your homework on the night issued, to .. idk, basically the list is endless, but doubt many of us even learn from it. we'd fall over and over, and pick ourselves up again. but would there ever be the day when we're too tired and overwhelmed? ---
on other terms, i got my voice back this afternoon! it cracked.. then WHAM ! :D im thinking about this time when i was young.. sometimes our feelings and words are really transparent arent they? this once, i sat in the car, rather sad, though i cant remember why... back to my story, there was this friend, ron; and he stood on the other side, pulling faces and trying to cheer me up.. transparency of the window? a window into my feelings ? the childish acts, so simplitic yet so meaningful. i was cheered up. and at times, those acts reoccur, but there is a limit, is it not true that we now evaluate our every move and actions? because we now think off consequences. playing hide and seek; huffing and panting from that run; taking my had to a safe sanctuary where we would hide for the next 10 minutes or so. i remember that date.210504. it was my sister's 1stbirthday...Ron; how is he now? i dont know. funny, but now I'm reminising about all the times together, wonder if he remembers ? oh well, its the past and things change. nothing is permenant but change. when we look into the past do we smile, or cry ? i choose to smile, for the past has gone, the good and the bad, no use crying over them i guess, all we can do now is look forward and strive on. we let go of those hands and hold new ones. they constantly change, and so do we as individuals. every minute we are changing, every thoguht determines our future.
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talking to you.. hmm. things have changed you have to admit. time continues, but the time on a clock repeats itself.. will we return to what we once were ?
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i realise my thoughts do not make sense. AHAHA. too much spare time on me i guess s: right now im just waiting; for what ? i really don't know. but im waiting. going out tomorrow kinda i guess, and im thankful for that. really dont want to stay home for much longer. one day is really enough. hrmm. i think i dreamt something yesterday... i cant be sure, but i did have a good sleep. mymy, the demazin pills make me HIGH. literally, they do. im tired now, guess im have an early night? (but ive been saying that for the last month and the earliest ive been to bed is 12, giving me a 5-6 hr slp max) its taken me over n hour to write this blog, i often find myself blank, drifting off, right now, i ask myself.. what do i do now?
when a balloon is overblown, its bursts. how much of it can i keep insde myself?
xx_.
nguggy
xx_.
nguggy